5th december

after last lesson with rachel she told us our tie performance was a bit confusing so we have lookd at how we can make the story line clearer we are still having this problem this due to us stripping our performance back originally cause there was to much context now we have to little.
firstly we looked at laurens chareter and why they dont  no the area very well so we have decided to make that they have just moved in ny adding a scene we have also cut down the creepy box music scenes as they lagged a bit and ow the performance runs better we have also added in a phone call with the creepy lady and laurens charecter.

scene 1
the scene with dylan and danilla winning the footbal match and winning a feather this has sayed the same as it fits with our modern outcome

scene 2
laurens scene with dylan moving in to the new area and the bet he couldnt get her the bird and that he is useless - this scne explains why he is getting the feather

scene 3

phone call scene with dylan and danile his companion and this will send him on his journey linking the scenes

scene 4

the first scene with creepy woman - music box music playing

scene 5
 riddle scene with the mirror and the prop of the text

scene 6
the old creepy woman agian with the music box music

scene 7
him and daniele  about fake tan in superdrug

scene 8 giving up arguement with his mum \

scene 9 the bed scene creepy lady comes in and the spell / dream lasts

scene 10  arguement scene with dylan and lauren

scene 11 phone call scene with lauren and me and creepy music ( i personally believe i should speak in this scene maybe we should try this)

scene 12   he wakes up to discover all was a dream (this needs to be really clear as the audinces may not get this ending we could use a peice of frantic assembly)

scene 13 the end

we thoutht that  making it a dream could mean it could be more artistic and not have to make sense we could play with it more

weakness
we could go to far wih it an the whole scene could be unrealistic

strengths
the whole thing could be really fun

we need to work on our structure this will happen if we keep trying new ideas and re arranging  also we took alot of our original story line out all wee need to do is add more in . we may need to include some of our original storyline like rachel suggested and go back and add things.